Ask the Great Fozzini!

[Fozzie Bear]

Welcome back again to another edition of "Ask the Great Fozzini" who, by looking into his crystal banana, can see into the future!! Yes, and even YOU might ask yourself, "Can it be for real?" And the answer is, "Absolutely not! But, that shouldn't stop you from playing!"

So, come forth to the Great Fozzini's Tent of Mystery as he beckons upon the Spirits, Sprites, and and other soft drinks to help configure the answers to your questions, pulling the knowledge from the other world and outer space, and making up the first thing that comes to his mind!

Questions about your future, or of universal knowledge, can be laid upon the threshold of the Tent of Mystery.

So, it is time for you to...

ASK THE GREAT FOZZINI!

[Beth C]

Oh lookie, a thread I didn't start.

Hey Fozzini...

Here's a question for you. Will you look into that crystal banana and tell us if you will start more games in this here game room? ;)

~Beth C

[Erine81981]

Here is a question for the Great Fozzini......



Will I ever get any alone time with the girl I love? I really love her. I need some answers now!!!! AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

[McFraggle]

Will I ever be a Game Master?

[Philo and Gunge]

Will we EVER be able to have another "Ze Board of Random Randomness"?

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh lookie, a thread I didn't start.

Hey Fozzini...

Here's a question for you. Will you look into that crystal banana and tell us if you will start more games in this here game room? ;)

~Beth C

I know all and I see all...

*Shakes magic 8 ball.*

"Unknown at this time."

[Fozzie Bear]

Will I ever get any alone time with the girl I love? I really love her. I need some answers now!!!! AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

There is no answer to this question in my crystal banana, but I will consult the rubber chicken.

This works by that I throw him into the air and whichever end is facing me tells me the answer--so, we'll let the fates choose this 'un.

In this case, heads means yes, and feet mean no.

*flings rubber chicken.*

Uh-oh.
Okay, then; best 2 out of three:
and the answer is...

What?! Not now!

Oh, good grief! My rubber chicken is trying to have contract negotiations. I'll have to get back to you.

[Fozzie Bear]

Will I ever be a Game Master?

It happened while I am 31 years old. Enjoy your youth. Have a life so, when you're 31, you won't be sitting in front of a computer all the time.

*Looks in crystal banana: "Will "I" ever have a life?" Response: "Don't bet your life on it." Shoot!*

[Fozzie Bear]

Will we EVER be able to have another "Ze Board of Random Randomness"?

Checking into my crystal banana...I see...a thread. Within this thread there are many words which added together make a common topic. This topic consists of questions and answers and...oh! HA HA!! It's only THIS thread reflecting ni my crystal banana! HAA!! :o

[Philo and Gunge]

What's up, doc?

[sugarbritchez]

Oh GREAT FOZZINI,

My question to you is after a long awaited return do you think it is possible for people at Muppet Central to welcome back a certain southern girl with sweet pants to the forum?

Your EXPERT advice would be greatly appreciated!


SugarBritchez :flirt:

[Aaron]

welcome back remember be

[Fozzie Bear]

What's up, doc?

My blood pressure and weight which, according to the crystal banana, won't be reducing anytime soon if I don't start dieting.

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh GREAT FOZZINI,

My question to you is after a long awaited return do you think it is possible for people at Muppet Central to welcome back a certain southern girl with sweet pants to the forum?

Your EXPERT advice would be greatly appreciated!


SugarBritchez :flirt:


I've checked the crystal banana and, LO! The spirit of one Billy the Psychic Rubber Chicken approcheth! I do believe that this is a sign that, even though it's been two years since the appearance of Billy the Psychic Rubber Chicken and he returns in this vision that, yes, it is possible!

Welcome back, Sweetpantz.

[Erine81981]

Oh great Fozzini answer with please,



Would I have to go on a date to be with a girl or would I have to go out with a girl to be with her?



signed Nobody Knows

[sugarbritchez]

welcome back remember be

Of course how could I forget you!!

~hugs Arron~ :flirt:

[sugarbritchez]

I've checked the crystal banana and, LO! The spirit of one Billy the Psychic Rubber Chicken approcheth! I do believe that this is a sign that, even though it's been two years since the appearance of Billy the Psychic Rubber Chicken and he returns in this vision that, yes, it is possible!

Welcome back, Sweetpantz.


Oh Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, muahhhhhh kissy kissy

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh great Fozzini answer with please,
Would I have to go on a date to be with a girl or would I have to go out with a girl to be with her?
signed Nobody Knows

Dear Nobody, I shall don the great and powerful rose-colored fuzzy-nose-glasses, and through these I shall see the answers to the questions of love and friendship. LO and Behold! To speak in the vernacular:

If you are with a girl then you are officially "be"ing with her, if you go out on a date with a girl, you will be "with" her; however, if you do not go anywhere or are not with a girl then you will "be" alone.

[Beauregard]

Dear Fozzwacka, or whatever,

To be or not to be? And who is Toby anyway?

Shakspeare's Ghost

[ryhoyarbie]

Dear Fozziehomesini..

Why?.......

ryan

[Fozzie Bear]

Dear Fozzwacka, or whatever,
To be or not to be? And who is Toby anyway?
Shakspeare's Ghost

The answers are: "BE," and "Spider-Man."

[Fozzie Bear]

Dear Fozziehomesini.. Why?.......ryan

Because I said so.
(At least, that's what Mama always says...)

[Philo and Gunge]

Oh, Great Fozzini! Will MuppetCrypts be banned before he becomes a senior member?

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh, Great Fozzini! Will MuppetCrypts be banned before he becomes a senior member?

This person exists not in my crystal banana.

[Philo and Gunge]

OH, GREAT FOZZINI...
Who's your tailor? I love that outfit!

[Infinity Sirius]

Oh, Great Fozzini! Will I ever get an avator for my account?

[Fozzie Bear]

OH, GREAT FOZZINI...
Who's your tailor? I love that outfit!

My ma.

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh, Great Fozzini! Will I ever get an avator for my account?

My crystal banana told me to link you to this:
http://forum.muppetcentral.com/showthread.php?t=5830

[Philo and Gunge]

Oh, Great Fozzini!

You never heard of the banana sketch?

[HeraLirambar]

Oh great Fozzini,
Will the monkey return in the sequel to Pirates of the Caribbean?
*crosses fingers*

[Erine81981]

Oh Great Fozzini,


Would it be looking if I just peek in the window?

[Kye]

Oh great Fozzini! My mind is consumed with anticipation of the arrival of my new Backstage muppet playset that I ordered online. When will It ship? When will It arrive? And maybe slightly more relevant...when, will at least 12 of my cluttered bookshelf dwelling muppets have a new, less dusty home?
If your Banana is true, and you guess the actual day of arrival, a reward rare muppet collectable will be sent directly to you! Im not testing you...Im testing the Banana. If you win, you should share the prize.

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh, Great Fozzini!
You never heard of the banana sketch?

Of COURSE I did! I perfected it! I, the Great Fozzini, heh heh...have known the wonderful...heh HA HA HA!..the HA HA HAAA HAAAAA!!!

OH! I CAN'T DO IT! HA HA HA HAA...

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh great Fozzini,
Will the monkey return in the sequel to Pirates of the Caribbean?
*crosses fingers*

I gaze into the crystal banana and do not see a paycheck with that monkey's name on it. I do see another monkey's name:

Johnny Depp.

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh Great Fozzini,
Would it be looking if I just peek in the window?

It'd be illegal, that's what it'd be!! :o

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh great Fozzini! My mind is consumed with anticipation of the arrival of my new Backstage muppet playset that I ordered online. When will It ship? When will It arrive? And maybe slightly more relevant...when, will at least 12 of my cluttered bookshelf dwelling muppets have a new, less dusty home?
If your Banana is true, and you guess the actual day of arrival, a reward rare muppet collectable will be sent directly to you! Im not testing you...Im testing the Banana. If you win, you should share the prize.

Uh-oh! The non believer broke my banana's reception. I can say this after checking with the slate bowling ball:

Will ship with others, arriving soon thereafter, and as soon as you open it and place the figures on it.

You owe me one crystal banana. :o

[sugarbritchez]

Oh Great Fozzini

When will I find true happiness?

[Philo and Gunge]

Oh, Great Fozzini!

When will I get my Looney Tunes "Carrotblanca" video I won on Ebay? I've been waiting for 1 week!

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh Great Fozzini When will I find true happiness?

I look to my happy pills, and therein lies the answer: I lay it on the table and drop a sprinkle of water on it and POOF! I discover...

You will find what you seek when you stop looking for it where you thought it was.

The happy pill has spoken, nyaa!

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh, Great Fozzini! When will I get my Looney Tunes "Carrotblanca" video I won on Ebay? I've been waiting for 1 week!

Continue to check your mail box and, sure enough, you will discover soon that you have received your video.

Sorry, but when I got it I never set the date and time on my crystal banana, plus the batteries for the remote control were too expensive!

[Beauregard]

Oh, Great Fozzini!

When will I get my Looney Tunes "Carrotblanca" video I won on Ebay? I've been waiting for 1 week!
Ooops, sorry, that video isn't very worth buying...I've seen it.

[Philo and Gunge]

Ooops, sorry, that video isn't very worth buying...I've seen it.
I don't care, I need SP, logo-free copies of some of those cartoons.

But while I'm here...

OH GREAT FOZZINI! Why do firemen wear red suspenders?

[Beauregard]

Why did the cat wear a hat?

[Fozzie Bear]

OH GREAT FOZZINI! Why do firemen wear red suspenders?

TO KEEP THEIR PANTS UP! WOCKA WOCKA!!

[Fozzie Bear]

Why did the cat wear a hat?

He didn't like to dress down. It was also to hide his bad toupe.

--------------------

Someone ask me questions about their future, and let's see what we can do. I have the crystal banana at the TV repair shop now...hope they can fix it.

In the meantime, I'm using this crystal chandalier.

[Philo and Gunge]

TO KEEP THEIR PANTS UP! WOCKA WOCKA!!
:confused:
I have a question, though:
For a long time it gave me nightmares... witnessing an injustice like that... it's a constant reminder of just how unfair this world can be... I can still hear them taunting him... silly rabbit, Trix are for kids... I mean, WHY COULDN'T THEY JUST GIVE HIM SOME CEREAL?

[Fozzie Bear]

He couldn't have the cereal because he's lactose intolerant so the milk will make him gassy, plus Trix are for KIDS! Not for rabbits. Rabbits are NOT allowed to eat Trix; but, adults with kid-like tastes ARE allowed to eat Trix. It is the rabbit's job to be pulled from a magician's hat, which is why he's a white rabbit. Rabbits are NOT allowed to eat Trix because they have the same effect that cuckoos have with Cocoa Puffs. It's a terrible, terrible mess!!

[Philo and Gunge]

Who will be my girlfriend? What does she look like?

[G-MAN]

Oh Great Fozzini:


Can you tell me how to get to Sesame Street?

[Erine81981]

Ok Fozzini,

What will happen in the year 2020 about me?

[Fozzie Bear]

Who will be my girlfriend? What does she look like?

Ahh...hmm...I do not have a name, but her hair appears dark, and she isn't anorexic. I see a green shirt, Kermit green to be exact. She's the one. She will be found very soon, and you should approach her or miss her forever. No, not that ugly one! The one over there across from you and more northeasterly--yeah, that's the one!

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh Great Fozzini: Can you tell me how to get to Sesame Street?

I can get you this far:

1 Lincoln Plaza, New York, NY 10023

[Fozzie Bear]

Ok Fozzini, What will happen in the year 2020 about me?

You're turning 38 that year.

[sarah_yzma]

Fozzini, when I go off to school, how will I be able to handle not being able to get onto MC every day?

[Fozzie Bear]

Fozzini, when I go off to school, how will I be able to handle not being able to get onto MC every day?

Badly, however you will sustain those necessities will Muppety stuff, whether it's on clothing or audio/visual means. Then, when you first sign-on to the internet, the second thing you'll hit will be MC--first you'll check e-mails. I know all this because it's exactly what happened to me; and, I was told all this my the man who lives in my finger--Mr. Psychic Bimbo.

[Kye]

Oh great Fozzini!!! How can I ever recover from seeing this...?

http://www.shades-of-night.com/random/02mayquest/kermit.jpg

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh great Fozzini!!! How can I ever recover from seeing this...?

http://www.shades-of-night.com/random/02mayquest/kermit.jpg

By looking at this picture (http://www.picturetrail.com/gallery/view?p=3&uid=1353907&gid=4898107&&&&imgid=62164946).

[Philo and Gunge]

Oh, Great Fozzini!

What is behind the green door?

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh, Great Fozzini!

What is behind the green door?

Prize #3.

[Philo and Gunge]

Oh, Great Fozzini!

What prize is prize #3?

[sarah_yzma]

and why is it better than prize #2?

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh, Great Fozzini! What prize is prize #3?

The one behind the green door.

[Fozzie Bear]

and why is it better than prize #2?

That would be a matter of opinion, although I'd choose what's behind the blue door!! I have a good feeling about the blue door.

[Philo and Gunge]

Oh, Great Fozzini!

Will we ever see The Jim Henson Hour on DVD?

[ryhoyarbie]

Hey homie,

everybody wayne chung tonight?

ryan

[McFraggle]

What about Wang Chung?

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh, Great Fozzini!
Will we ever see The Jim Henson Hour on DVD?

The possibilities are astounding; but, not soon.

[Fozzie Bear]

Hey homie, everybody wayne chung tonight? ryan

What about Wang Chung?

I do every night. It is highly suggested.

[Philo and Gunge]

Oh, Great Fozzini! What is GAC (http://forums.toonzone.net/showthread.php?t=117224)?

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh, Great Fozzini! What is GAC (http://forums.toonzone.net/showthread.php?t=117224)?

All seems fuzzy, appears to be a possible forum and appears to be about the Golden Age of Cartoons; pre-1970's stuff.

[Philo and Gunge]

If practice makes perfect, and nobody's perfect, then why practice?

[ryhoyarbie]

Fozzini......

If a tree fell and no one was there to hear it, did the tree make a sound?

ryan

[Fozzie Bear]

If practice makes perfect, and nobody's perfect, then why practice?

This is where I have to slip into GURU status:

Perfection is the item we all strive to achieve, unless it's someone who is an underachiever and then perfection isn't an option but rather failure is their goal. We are not perfect, nor will we ever be, but in order to attain the status of perfection, we must practice and exercise our abilities to get as near to perfection as we can. The goal: Perfection. The way to achieve that goal: Practice. Practice makes perfect is an overstatement; however, it is sensible in that it is what we desire.

Capiche?

[Fozzie Bear]

Fozzini......If a tree fell and no one was there to hear it, did the tree make a sound? ryan

It did. It also called for help saying, "I've fallen, and I can't take root!"

[Philo and Gunge]

Will Iron Maiden ever get Bruce Dickenson back?

[Philo and Gunge]

What Henson rarities will we see in the future?

[Fozzie Bear]

Will Iron Maiden ever get Bruce Dickenson back?

No. But, as they get older, they will get rustier.

What Henson rarities will we see in the future?

Nothing to note at this time; however, I see that in the future something that is in the form of The Muppets will be released. At least, that's what the Ghost of Billy the Psychic Rubber Chicken says.

[Philo and Gunge]

Who are the two old guys in the balcony?

(The most common Muppet question) :rolleyes:

[G-MAN]

Oh Great Fozzini, what is the meaning of life?

[Philo and Gunge]

Oh, Great Fozzini, what Muppets will be in series 11 of the action figures?

[Fozzie Bear]

Who are the two old guys in the balcony?

(The most common Muppet question) :rolleyes:

I will not respond via the Crystal Banana, but I will give you this hint:
:sleep: :boo:

Oh, Great Fozzini, what Muppets will be in series 11 of the action figures?

My Crystal Banana says, "Due to constraints regarding Confidentiality Agreements, this information is withheld." Sorry. But, you're gonna like it.

Oh Great Fozzini, what is the meaning of life?

Okay, here I go shifting into Guru status again: Life is defined as "the state of being which begins with generation, birth, or germination, and ends with death," and the meaning of that definition is the experiences you have during the time between conception and death, and how those experiences directly or indirectly influence the experiences of others, whether positively or negatively, and thus the meaning of life as YOU will define it when it's over lies solely in your hands based on the decisions you choose. So, choose wisely, and make the Meaning of Life mean something good.

[Philo and Gunge]

Oh, Great Fozzini! Will Philo & Gunge ever come back to Muppet-dom?

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh, Great Fozzini! Will Philo & Gunge ever come back to Muppet-dom?

No. I suggest buying Fraggle DVDs.

[Whatever]

Have you gotten Series 8 yet? It's reached Memphis!

In case you can't tell, I'm trying to reach you in about every mode of communication I can think of... I'll try ESP next. :D

[sarah_yzma]

o great fozzini. of whom I live my life by and pray to every day.....why does my dentist insist on making me wait for so long ever time I see him/her (depends on which one I see)?????

waiting anxiously.....

[Fozzie Bear]

Have you gotten Series 8 yet? It's reached Memphis!

In case you can't tell, I'm trying to reach you in about every mode of communication I can think of... I'll try ESP next. :D

Not yet, but my paycheck will hit hopefully tonight! BTW, I heard your psychic message, but my lines got disconnected...yeah, that's it...

[Fozzie Bear]

o great fozzini. of whom I live my life by and pray to every day..........

You're very wise...

why does my dentist insist on making me wait for so long ever time I see him/her (depends on which one I see)?????
waiting anxiously.....

Can you hold for a moment, please...*beep*

[Philo and Gunge]

For a long time it gave me nightmares... witnessing an injustice like that... it's a constant reminder of just how unfair this world can be... I can still hear him taunting him... Barney, my pebbles... I mean, WHY COULDN'T FRED JUST GIVE BARNEY SOME CEREAL?

[Fozzie Bear]

For a long time it gave me nightmares... witnessing an injustice like that... it's a constant reminder of just how unfair this world can be... I can still hear him taunting him... Barney, my pebbles... I mean, WHY COULDN'T FRED JUST GIVE BARNEY SOME CEREAL?

It was a situation like this: Fred was always buying cereal all his life, and Barney would NEVER buy any. All he'd do is take take take. Never give or help buy. The problems started when Fred would hear a sound in the middle of the night and Barney had climbed into the windows and was eating Fred's cereal, and that just got to Fred. So, he determined to just keep the cereal away from Barney. But, of course, he never succeeds.

Hmm...I'm hungry.

[Philo and Gunge]

Oh, Great Fozzini!

Did Daffy Duck's script for "The Scarlet Pumpernickel" ever made into a real movie for Warner Bros.?

[Philo and Gunge]

Oh, Great Fozzini!

What's MC Hammer's favorite cartoon?

[Philo and Gunge]

All seems fuzzy, appears to be a possible forum and appears to be about the Golden Age of Cartoons; pre-1970's stuff.
You know, you were right!

[sarah_yzma]

Fozzini...

what is belly-button lint made of?

with a furry belly in OK
Sarah

[Philo and Gunge]

Great Fozzini! Where art, thou?

[muppetmayhem]

oh grand fozzini. Will we ever be able to watch fraggle rock and the muppet show on television again? :confused:

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh, Great Fozzini!
Did Daffy Duck's script for "The Scarlet Pumpernickel" ever made into a real movie for Warner Bros.?

Filming began but stopped after Diva-Daffy threw a fit because there were green M&Ms in the bowl.

While that was never completed, and the scripts and film disappeared over the years, the following script is available online, and is NOT the script by Daffy: http://www.spotlightpublications.com/pumpernickel.htm

[Fozzie Bear]

Please ask all your question(s) in one post, it's easier that way.

Oh, Great Fozzini!
What's MC Hammer's favorite cartoon?

Hammertime

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fozzie Bear
All seems fuzzy, appears to be a possible forum and appears to be about the Golden Age of Cartoons; pre-1970's stuff.

You know, you were right!

Of course, and as always!

Great Fozzini! Where art, thou?

At work, wishing I were home.

[Fozzie Bear]

Fozzini...what is belly-button lint made of? with a furry belly in OK Sarah

Dead body skin cells, hair, dust in the air, and lint from your clothing as your body rubs against it.

Or, the more fun answer is: Gremlins put it in there when you ain't lookin'

[Fozzie Bear]

oh grand fozzini. Will we ever be able to watch fraggle rock and the muppet show on television again? :confused:

Depends on where in the world you are...it's available in some places...but not where you are.
============================

EVERYONE:

Keep in mind you are being given the opportunity to divulge in other-worldly knowledge from the cosmos by use of my crystal banana! Ask about your fortune, and your future--ask about the things you always wondered about but were too afraid to ask! BEHOLD! The Great Fozzini's Crystal Banana knows ALL!!

[Erine81981]

Oh Great Fozzini,

Has the secret admiers stopped delivering yet?

[Philo and Gunge]

Great Fozzini!

When will there be world peace?

and

Will the Larry Doyle Looney Tunes shorts ever play in theaters? What movies will they be played with?

[Philo and Gunge]

Here's some for ya.

Why do we park in Driveways and Drive on Parkways?

Why in Baseball is the Foul Poul in Fair Territory?

How does a bus driver get out and close the door if its done with that lever inside?

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh Great Fozzini, Has the secret admiers stopped delivering yet?

Yes. :cry:

[Fozzie Bear]

Great Fozzini!
When will there be world peace? and Will the Larry Doyle Looney Tunes shorts ever play in theaters? What movies will they be played with? Why do we park in Driveways and Drive on Parkways? Why in Baseball is the Foul Poul in Fair Territory? How does a bus driver get out and close the door if its done with that lever inside?

To distant to tell; strong possibility, but the movies haven't been made yet; answered several games ago; because it was played at the fair; he uses a remote control.

[Philo and Gunge]

If progress means to go forward what does congress mean?
Would you get arrested for running into a fire station yelling "MOVIE, MOVIE!!!"

[Fozzie Bear]

If progress means to go forward what does congress mean?
Would you get arrested for running into a fire station yelling "MOVIE, MOVIE!!!"

Congress: To cheat the gress out of something.

Yes.

[Whatever]

Congress: To cheat the gress out of something.

Yes.
What is a gress? :confused:

[Fozzie Bear]

What is a gress?

This: http://people.cs.uchicago.edu/~yongzh/pub/PDCS2003.pdf

[Philo and Gunge]

Oh, Great Fozzini!

Who framed Roger Rabbit? I've heard a rumor it was Christopher Llyod, but he'd never do that!

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh, Great Fozzini!

Who framed Roger Rabbit? I've heard a rumor it was Christopher Llyod, but he'd never do that!

It was Judge Doom who had a remarkable resemblance to Christopher Lloyd, except Christopher Lloyd's eyes aren't so fiery red and full of hate. More like sea-foam hazel and full of duh.

[Whatever]

This: http://people.cs.uchicago.edu/~yongzh/pub/PDCS2003.pdf
So how do you cheat the gress out of something?

[Fozzie Bear]

So how do you cheat the gress out of something?

When the Gress is in action, it won't work if you cheat it by leaving out one of the components known as either the user interface, the server, or a parameter. Since the Gress is mostly collected data transferred between particular modules, contained in seperate Grid Physic Networks, then by not including some information then you are able to cheat the system, thus you can make the final format become a creation that best suits the necessities of the reports you have to deliver.

Outside of this nutty response, you'll have to visit the "Ask the Great Bill Gates" thread.

ANYBODY DARE ASK THE UNIVERSALLY UNKNOWN QUESTIONS WHICH WE SHALL BECKON OF THE COSMOS AND THE POWERS OF THAT REALM??
Don't forget, I own a crystal banana!! It's MAGIC! :eek:

[Fozzie Bear]

THROUGH PERSONAL EMAIL COMES THE MOST IMPORTANT QUESTION I'VE EVER BEEN ASKED!! AND NOW, I KNOW THE ANSWER AND CAN GIVE IT TO YOU STRAIGHT!!!

Dear Great Fozzini,

What is the meaning of life, and what's it all about?

The answer is:
THE HOKEY POKEY!!

(My sources must remain anonymous.)

[muppetmayhem]

oh great Fozini.

Which came first?

the chicken or the egg? :( :p

[Fozzie Bear]

oh great Fozini. Which came first? the chicken or the egg? :( :p

Ah, the most popular question every time I offer up cosmic knowledge from the vast reaches of the universe, but ALAS! The answer is:

The Chicken; the egg had to come from somewhere.

[Philo and Gunge]

Oh, Great Fozzini!

Why can't I find plaster of paris in Paris?

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh, Great Fozzini! Why can't I find plaster of paris in Paris?

Because you don't live there.

[Philo and Gunge]

Oh, Great Fozzini!

What happens when you reach a million posts?

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh, Great Fozzini! What happens when you reach a million posts?

Your computer crashes.

NEXT QUESTION?!

[Crazy Harry]

Oh, Great Fozzini!

Who's idea was this?

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh, Great Fozzini! Who's idea was this?

Mine. A few years ago it came to me in a dream one night. See, there were these two fish and they bestowed upon me great powers of knowledge and also gave me the gift of Jelly of the Month Club. Well, normally after I have a bad side of beef for supper (and a visit by Marley and them), I restart the "Ask" threads so that the wonderous knowledge of the cosmos can be shared, and yet I keep getting stuck with questions like "Which came first, the chicken or the egg?" or "Why do they call them apartments when they're stuck together?" or "Who's idea was this?"

heh heh...

[Philo and Gunge]

Oh Great Fozzini!

What's up with that?

[Crazy Harry]

Oh Great Fozzini!

Can you answer two questions at once?

[McFraggle]

Better yet, Oh Great Fozzini!

Can you answer three questions at once?

[Muppet Dudemang]

Magical, Masterful and fantastical Fozzini can you please tell me the answers to these questions, oh great one?

Will she leave him and be mine?

Will I see another Alice Cooper concert?

Will I get all the CDs and DVDs on my list from Bali?

Will I meet Ween?

Will my band happen?

Will I get more muppet and sesame street rare music?

This is not my wonderful life HOW DID I GET HERE? :eek:

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh Great Fozzini! What's up with that?

That is up because Those were taken.

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh Great Fozzini! Can you answer two questions at once?

I can indeed multitask! Not only can I walk while patting my head and rubbing my tummy, I can also read and type simultaneouslsdji;iayekas;df23y

Oops.

[Fozzie Bear]

Magical, Masterful and fantastical Fozzini can you please tell me the answers to these questions, oh great one?
Will she leave him and be mine?
Will I see another Alice Cooper concert?
Will I get all the CDs and DVDs on my list from Bali?
Will I meet Ween?
Will my band happen?
Will I get more muppet and sesame street rare music?
This is not my wonderful life HOW DID I GET HERE? :eek:

If you make more money.
When he's in town.
No.
I think you should ween yourself of that band.
Make it so, #1.
Sure.
I'll leave that one to your biology teacher--or paranormal researcher...

[Fozzie Bear]

Better yet, Oh Great Fozzini! Can you answer three questions at once?

If a fella can walk, chew gum, rub his tummy, and pat his head--there's a good chance.

See above.

[Philo and Gunge]

Oh, Great Fozzini!

Will I ever be able to go back to back to the future?

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh, Great Fozzini! Will I ever be able to go back to back to the future?

"When you get that baby up to 88 miles per hour..."

[Crazy Harry]

Oh, Great Fozzini!

If it takes two minutes to boil one egg, how long would it take to boil six eggs?

[Muppet Dudemang]

Oh Fozzini, for your wisdom of my last questions I now have another:
If someone says that they are going to go to sleep does that mean that sleep is an action or a place, some gigantic dreamland? hmmm.

[Philo and Gunge]

Oh Great Magical Puppety Fozzini Style Guy!

If I meet a frog named Phillip Phil, what should I do?

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh, Great Fozzini!

If it takes two minutes to boil one egg, how long would it take to boil six eggs?

Really, it takes 2 minutes to COOL the egg in cold water after it's been boiled. Depending on how you like your eggs (soft or hard boiled) is what determines how long you boil it. I like mine hard boiled (because I have a hard head), and so I put the eggs in a sauce pan with cold water and then once the water is simmering, I boil the eggs for 7 minutes; pour out the water, and then run cold water over the eggs for about 2 minutes to keep them cool. Peeling the egg under a trickle of cold water will help the process of peeling the eggs easier, but the eggs should be at least 5 days older than their packing date to peel them easier.

Oh Fozzini, for your wisdom of my last questions I now have another:
If someone says that they are going to go to sleep does that mean that sleep is an action or a place, some gigantic dreamland? hmmm.

AH! Finally, a question deserving of the Cosmos!
SLEEP is a verb, but also a noun. Therefore it is an action AND a proper "place." As a verb, it is resting by suspension of voluntary exercise of the powers of body and mind, being dormant or inactive. As a noun, it is described as that state in which action is suspended. So, when someone says they are "going to sleep," they really are.

Oh Great Magical Puppety Fozzini Style Guy!
If I meet a frog named Phillip Phil, what should I do?

Call him Kermit.

[Philo and Gunge]

Oh, Great Fozzini!

When will I get a new hard drive for my computer?

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh, Great Fozzini!
When will I get a new hard drive for my computer?

When your computer gets a license to drive.

[Crazy Harry]

Oh, Great Fozzini!

What's this button do?

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh, Great Fozzini!
What's this button do?

That's the ejector button for my chai-------- !

[G-MAN]

Oh, Great Fozzini

Is it just me, or was that gag pulled last time?

Also, would you like to take a survey??????????????????????????????

[Beakerfan]

Oh, Great Fozzini,
is there more to life than this? :confused:

[Crazy Harry]

Oh, Great Fozzini!

Do I have to wait until Monday for you to answer this question.

[Philo and Gunge]

Oh Great Fozzini!

:sing: Can you feel the love tonight? :sing:

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh, Great Fozzini Is it just me, or was that gag pulled last time? Also, would you like to take a survey?

It's just you. I don't mind a survey as long as it's a new one.

Oh, Great Fozzini, is there more to life than this?

See my prior answer to the meaning of life etc. Life is what you make of it, so is there more to it than what you currently have? Sure, but only if you make it so.

Oh, Great Fozzini! Do I have to wait until Monday for you to answer this question.

Wednesday is more likely. Oh, look! It's Wednesday!! I was right!! I'm so GOOD at this!!

Oh Great Fozzini! Can you feel the love tonight?

*Blushing* Boy, can I?! :o

[Philo and Gunge]

Oh Great Fozzini!

Will the "Make Way in the Bubble Bath" thread make it into hot thread-dom?

[Whatever]

Oh grestimo Fozzinni:
Do you know you have a banana in your ear?

[Whatever]

Sag' mir, wer ist der Typ da neben mir? Wer ist der Typ und was will der hier?

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh Great Fozzini! Will the "Make Way in the Bubble Bath" thread make it into hot thread-dom?

One day. Keep playing.

Oh grestimo Fozzinni:
Do you know you have a banana in your ear? Sag' mir, wer ist der Typ da neben mir? Wer ist der Typ und was will der hier?

I can't hear you, I have a banana in my ear. Thank goodness I can read. From your translation, seems you want to know (and this can be translated in several different ways, but I believe you want to know) Who is typing beside you, and who wants him there? Bien, s'ils sont là près de vous et vous ne savez toujours pas que je ne vous dis pas. Ainsi, là.

[Beakerfan]

Oh, great and wise one! Will I ever become a famous movie star?

[Philo and Gunge]

Oh, Grand Fozzini!

Will I ever be a puppeteer at JHC?

[McFraggle]

Will I ever be rich and famous?

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh, great and wise one! Will I ever become a famous movie star?

No, however the possibility is there.

Oh, Grand Fozzini! Will I ever be a puppeteer at JHC?

No, but I would consider trying for the Creature Shop.

Will I ever be rich and famous?

No. Never.

[homerthegreat]

Should I go get a BLT or a taco?

[Fozzie Bear]

Should I go get a BLT or a taco?

Taco, get chicken and cheese with the vegetables. Beef may not be so good for you; also, stay away from too much bacon--it'll clog the arteries, even with the lettuce and tomato--not to mention the butter on the bread.

But, BOY! a BLT sounds good.
I think I'm going to have that for lunch today... :p

[Philo and Gunge]

Would you like to shoot me now or wait till you get home?

[Beakerfan]

When I look up at the sky at night, it looks like I could touch it, but in my mind I know it's impossible. So here's my question: Do you think space just keeps going up and up and up and never ends, or do you think something's there to stop you from drifting away for eons and eons of time (if even possible?) :confused:

[Erine81981]

Great Fozzini,

Will I ever hear from Kev about my Role Play Idea? LOL :o

[Fozzie Bear]

Would you like to shoot me now or wait till you get home?

Now is fine.
*Grabs water gun*
SQUIRT!

When I look up at the sky at night, it looks like I could touch it, but in my mind I know it's impossible. So here's my question: Do you think space just keeps going up and up and up and never ends, or do you think something's there to stop you from drifting away for eons and eons of time (if even possible?)

Your body has microbes all in it, little bacteria that--when you die from the lack of oxygen in space--you'll begin to decompose. Sooner or later, you would cease to exist anyways (physically) and would never ever possibly reach the end of space anyways. So don't worry about it.

Great Fozzini, Will I ever hear from Kev about my Role Play Idea? LOL

Who cares about Kev?! I'm the GREAT FOZZINI!!

[G-MAN]

Duck Season or Rabbit Season?

[Erine81981]

Yea I guess your right about that, Fozzie.

Great Fozzini,

Is my life going to get any better then it is right now? Oh and What season is it Rabbit or Duck?

[Philo and Gunge]

What about Elmer Season?

[sherocks]

Dear Great Fozzini,

What is the meaning of life, and what's it all about?

Your answer was good, but this was a movie & it was about life & stuff & exploding obese men.

Don't you remember the famous catchy tune?

[Fozzie Bear]

Duck Season or Rabbit Season?

Duck Season runs
Ducks (Except Pintails and Canvasbacks) 11/26-11/28, 12/4-12/24, 12/26-1/30
Pintails and Canvasbacks 1/1-1/30
Youth Days (Ducks only) 2/5 - 2/6

Rabbit Season runs Oct. 16, 2004 - Feb. 28, 2005

So, it would appear that the next available season would be Wabbit--er, Rabbit Season.

What about Elmer Season?

Elmer is ALWAYS in season! :P

Your answer was good, but this was a movie & it was about life & stuff & exploding obese men. Don't you remember the famous catchy tune?

YOU DARE AROUSE THE WRATH OF THE GREAT AND POWERFUL FOZZINI?! Doth thou wishest for to have a FAKE answer, then thou shouldst asketh a gypsy or fortune teller! I have been given great knowledge from the cosmos and bowl of rice with butter and---no, wait, that's my lunch order...er, from the cosmos and am offering to share that knowledge with...folks. Um...yeah. So, you shall be cursed now. Uh...well...I can't think of one, so you'll have to wait. No! I have one: 20 lashes with a feather against the palms of BOTH your feet. So there. Nyaa.

Next question?

[Philo and Gunge]

Oh Great Fozzini!

Was Disneys Muppets banned?

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh Great Fozzini! Was Disneys Muppets banned?

No. Contact Phil regarding such subjects.

Okay, have we run out of questions of cosmic knowledge necessities? I haven't consulted the crystal banana, or even the Ghost of Billy the Psychic Rubber Chicken, in quite a while rather answering guru-ish questions. If we don't have any good questions left, I'll close this thread until next year and re-open ASK THE GREAT FOZZINI.

[Philo and Gunge]

Oh, Great Fozzini!

Can I have your autograph OR Billy the Rubber Chicken's autograph?

[Fozzie Bear]

Oh, Great Fozzini! Can I have your autograph OR Billy the Rubber Chicken's autograph?

Send a postage paid self addressed envelope to:
GREAT FOZZINI
ICO Kevin and Muley
POB 750823
MEMPHIS TN 38175-0823

[Philo and Gunge]

Riddle me this, Great Fozzini!

Gaze into your crystal banana and tell me in full 24-hour detail, what will happen on March 23, 2020

[Fozzie Bear]

Riddle me this, Great Fozzini! Gaze into your crystal banana and tell me in full 24-hour detail, what will happen on March 23, 2020

It doesn't work that way, but I will look to see and will tell you this:

Beware public transportation that day, as well as large bodies of water. An apple or peach will be a necessity for you on that day, as will fresh clean water. I think you will find yourself needing attention of some sort from someone in pink and white. The good news is, you will have all your teeth and most of your hair.

Which is better than me who is lucky enough to have all my teeth, but hardly ANY of my hair. :(
------------------------------------------

This ends all the posts for this thread now. We'll resume "Ask Fozzini" on a different date in the future, but the crystal banana is fuzzy on when. Keep your eye's peeled--like this banana, which is hard to eat!